This is gonna be the first text in English in my website, this was supposed to happen at any time.

So I’ve been thinking the so many times I’ve sensed the way things were going and ran a difficult decision to help me and hep others. At the beginning it was to help others, but let me feel comfortable.

When you are with somebody, or have a relation, a society, friendship or anything that produces expectations, demands attention or reliability it is down to what many times we call affinity, but subsequently it’s a matter of equalizing the expectations level. Sometimes you’re in love with someone that might have been in love with you one day, but it’s not anymore or vice-versa. Sometimes, this relations is over for you and it’s easy for you the way you take it. Sometimes, it’s about sex or about company, about care or attention, so many particular things to one, that whatsoever in the other, is not.

Considering this, one person (let’s say me) is very comfortable, calling whenever I want,  talking whenever I wish, and answering according to the end I am planning to have. But on the other side, a person generating too much expectations is not happy, or yet doesn’t know it, but is always accepting and never taking time to think about that: “where we are going?”, “do I wanna go this direction?”, “is it really happening, or am I fooling myself?”

And after a few repetitions I realize the person is not happy nor seeing where things are going, and many, many times for respect I have taken decisions against myself in order to save people’s time and “suffering”. And no matter how honest or right you are, you will only be proof right in long terms: where nobody is going to remember! But no problem, that makes my soul lighter and it is what I would like people could do to me as well:  once you’re decided let me know, so that I can decide what I wanna do myself. Stay or let go now changes its ownership to the right hand to decide.

Looking back to my mom’s point of view, if I am comfortable and the person says nothing, you are wrong to cut off this person’s suffering, cause lesson may have finished for you, but not for her. And leaving, by some angle of looking at it, could be a selfish decision. Who knows in time what changes or not? No one. But who’s got eternity for every relation?

Whether my mom’s right or not, it’s just not a point to opt in or opt out, but a feeling decision. If you’re good ‘not gone’ then stay. If sensations oncoming disturbs your senses, it’s time to take courage, open hands and let go. Let people pick their position,

Life is like a sensor, once your feeling is blind you’re too vulnerable.

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